Yesterday, as I was scrolling through my Facebook feed, I came across Beyonce’s birthday playlist. Of course I know when her birthday is. I’m surprised it’s not a national holiday.

Yes, it’s a thinly veiled attempt at plugging in Jay Z’s Tidal company.

But the playlist, itself is a hilarious study in ass-kissery. Here’s the intro:

“In honor of her birthday, Beyoncé’s loved ones dedicate the songs that narrate their most cherished moments with her.”

In other words…

IT’S ALL ABOUT BEYONCE.

I would tell you what I think about the songs, but you can’t even play them without a Tidal account. It’s mostly old school R&B, sprinkled with Beyonce’s singles.

Surprisingly, Jay Z chose “Yellow”, by Coldplay. I guess it makes sense, since they’re so tight with the Paltrow-Martin family. The little note he left is cute, too, if you can overlook the fact that the song means nothing.

There’s also a note by Blue Ivy, who chose “Part of Your World”, from The Little Mermaid: “Mommy, you sung this to me all the time. Happy birthday, Mommy!”

Um, WHAT? I need to hear Beyonce sing this!

Header image credit: beyonce.com

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